Sleep

Sleep has been such a quest for all three of us since Lorelei was born. Around 8 weeks, she started sleeping in six and seven-hour chunks of time, which was a great relief from every three hours. That lasted about a month. Then, she started waking up earlier and earlier, so again, I was nursing her every three or four hours. I figured she was hungry, and most of the "sleep experts" did not recommend sleep training until six months or more. I was exhausted and cranky all the time, and didn't know how to fix the problem.

Everyone gave me advice: "She's obviously not getting enough from you." "Why don't you try formula/cereal/people food?" It was so frustrating. I wasn't prepared to give her formula or anything other than breastmilk for the first six months. I knew she was getting enough; breastmilk just digests faster than formula. Deep down, I knew there was something else going on, but I was too tired to really get to the bottom of it.

It wasn't until I started a new job when she was six months old that we finally decided we needed to really try to fix things. First, we got rid of the pacifier, thinking that she needed it to go to sleep. That didn't really work; she was still waking up every three hours. I would nurse her, and she'd go back to sleep. We tried to let her cry it out, but it was so excruciating to hear her cry, and I was always wondering if she needed me. What kind of mother was I to ignore her cries.

I read a book by Dr. Ferber, and it changed my mind about crying it out. I could really see how Lorelei would wake up and not know how to put herself back to sleep. So one night, we were determined to see it through. She woke up at 10:30, and Jerry checked on her to make sure she was ok. One of us continued to check on her every 7 or 8 minutes. She screamed for an hour. It was torture. I wondered if we were doing the right thing. But then she fell asleep and slept till 5 am! She hadn't done that since she was 8 weeks old! Maybe we were on the right track. The next night was a bit of a backslide. She woke again around 10:30 and fussed/cried for 30 minutes, then fell asleep. She woke up twice more after that. I was really frustrated. On night three, she slept straight through until 3 am, I fed her, and she slept until 7 am!

I think we really figured out the problem, and now she can put herself back to sleep. Not every night is perfect, and she sometimes wakes twice, but I usually only have to feed her once. It's a work in progress; I hope it continues to improve.

The Harness

The day she was born, the doctors evaluated Lorelei's hips, and determined she had severe hip dysplasia in both sockets. Because her bottom had been wedged into my cervix for an unknown period of time, the hips didn't form properly. The pediatric orthopedists at the hospital said she would have to wear a Pavlik harness for at least 12-14 weeks.

I was upset. I felt like it was my fault her hips were in that condition. If I had just gotten another ultrasound, or laid in bed differently, or did specific exercises, or lowered my stress level more, maybe she wouldn't have that problem.

The harness was a pain in the ass. Odd for me to feel that way about a brace that ultimately corrected the problem without surgery, but really, it was a pain in the ass. Clothes didn't fit properly, the harness materials (mostly velcro) scraped against my skin while I nursed her, the velcro sometimes caught on certain fabrics, it seemed to be uncomfortable for her while she slept. I had all these cloth diapers I wanted to use, but the logistics with the harness seemed complicated. Disposable diapers were the best way to go--the least bulky. But the worst part was that I felt like it was a barrier between the two of us. We couldn't really cuddle effectively; the harness made her body stiff. Where was the soft, cuddly baby I was expecting?

I knew she only had to wear it temporarily, and I tried to focus on that goal. It was either the harness, or surgery when she was a year old. In all other aspects, she was perfectly healthy. So I coped with it as best as I could. We could only take it off for brief periods of time, for baths, and we didn't really bathe her every day, so she was in it quite a bit. Her orthopedist, Dr. Phillips was great (I think L had a crush on him with his British accent!), and very supportive. After 8 weeks, she was doing so well that we could start to wean her from the harness. Naps and nighttime only, and then at 14 weeks, I threw the harness away for good! What a relief for all of us.

I don't have a clear picture of the harness, or L in it, but here's a shot of her at five days old with her cousin, Zach:

You can see the harness over her shoulders.

Birth Story...finally!

Welcome, Lorelei Brooke!

It has been a busy five months, and I'm just now getting to the birth story! It's been hectic, but fun, and here's how it started:

On my due date, January 17, I really didn't feel any different than usual, despite Jerry continuing to ask me if I felt any contractions. That got annoying. Around 10 pm, however, I started having some mild contractions off and on, with no regularity. After midnight, they became more regular, every five to six minutes, and lasted about a minute each. We weren't supposed to go to the hospital until they were every four minutes for at least an hour--or until my water broke. I was laboring in bed, timing the contractions, and Jerry was painting the fireplace (!). He said he wouldn't have the opportunity to do it after the baby came, so he might as well finish it up. I had started helping him earlier in the evening, because apparently I lost my mind so close to the end of the pregnancy.

Anyway, around 2 am, as I was laboring on my side in bed, I felt and heard a *pop*, and then a gush of liquid as my water broke. We figured it was safe for us to go to the hospital. While I got myself cleaned up and ready to go, Jerry dropped Chopper off at Ben and Dani's. After my water broke, the contractions got more intense. Thankfully, the hospital wasn't more than five minutes away. We were so excited! We got to the hospital with all our gear: suitcase, labor bag, laptop. We thought we had some time to kill once we were admitted, so Jerry planned on playing on the computer, and I had packed a book. Fools! Once we got to triage, they asked me some basic questions, then brought us both to a small room for evaluation and ultrasound. I used the bathroom once more, and noticed quite a bit of meconium discharge. I hadn't seen any at home, and I was in a lot of pain at that point, so I didn't really panic. I mentioned it to the nurse. At this point, it was about 4 am.

The nurse did an ultrasound and discovered that the baby was in a breech position, and I would need an emergency C-section. Since I hadn't had an ultrasound since the 20-week anatomy scan, this was a huge, not-so-pleasant surprise. While they prepped the OR for the surgery, the contractions got worse, and I felt the urge to push. I was miserable. I kept saying I didn't want a C-section, but I didn't have a choice. I didn't realize until much later how quiet and helpless Jerry felt; usually, there's not much he's scared of, but this was one of those times.

The nurse asked me if I had anything to eat recently. Now, because our Lamaze instructor said we should labor at home as much as possible, and have something to eat since we wouldn't be able to do that once we went to the hospital, Jerry had gone out around midnight to get me some chicken nuggets from McDonalds. I got in a bit of trouble from the nurse because of that, and they had to give me some special meds so I wouldn't puke during surgery. Once they administered the epidural, I felt better, but it made me shake uncontrollably throughout the entire surgery. They had to strap my arms down. I felt terrified as they wheeled me into the OR. I hadn't had any prior surgeries, so I didn't know what to expect.

I didn't feel a thing as they started the surgery, and I don't remember too much, but at some point I heard our little girl cry! She was born at 6:25 am. We were both relieved and overjoyed. Jerry did a great job with the pictures:

Our first meeting:
Our first family photo:

Jerry got to see the staff clean up the baby and prep her for my first meeting with her, and everyone noticed that as she was laying on the warming tray, her leg flew up and kicked her head! Since she had been in a breech position for so long, and since her bottom was wedged into my cervix, she developed hip dysplasia and had to wear a harness for the first 14 weeks. More on that in another post.

Jerry went to recovery with the baby, while the doctor stitched me up. Jerry said Dr. Vega was just what a surgeon should be: cool as ice. It felt like forever, but eventually they brought me to to recovery too. I couldn't wait to see her, and while we began our first nursing session, Jerry reminded me that we still didn't have a name. Originally, we planned on Caroline Betsy, but we had a couple other options just in case. We decided that since her birth was a bit of a whirlwind, we'd name her Lorelei, which means "siren". She was a feisty one right from the beginning! Her middle name is Brooke, which we thought went well with her first name, and we wanted it to start with a "B" after my grandmother, Betty. We were relieved that we were ok, and our little Lorelei Brooke was beautiful!

Nothing fits

38.5 weeks

Don't I look happy? Not only do I now have a problem finding enough clothes to wear in unnaturally cold weather (is it considered flashing if it involves my extra large belly?), but my cankles have swollen so badly that socks cut off all circulation. But I can't wear flip flops in 30 degree weather. Baby's not that much of a heat source.

Sadly, I had to have my wedding band cut off my finger last week. It was really depressing; I hadn't taken it off in six years. But I tried to remove it, and my finger turned purple. Jerry almost had to take me to the emergency room. Thankfully, it's a plain band, so it's not a problem to repair. But I wish I had taken it off earlier with my engagement ring. Fun stuff!

Today is my last day in the office, and not a moment too soon. I get so exhausted just getting ready in the morning--all that standing! And my mind is in such a fog. I'll work from home as long as I can, which, according to the doctor, might be awhile.

Dilation has begun!

But the doctor doesn't think I'll deliver early--right on time, in fact. I guess that's ok with me, but tell that to my new cankles.

I'm happy to be on vacation for a week and a half, and then I only have to go into the office for a few days next semester. It'll be nice to relax and get some last minute stuff done. I feel like I've been slacking off, and Jerry's doing all the work. He says he doesn't mind...

Our car seat is scheduled for delivery tomorrow, and after that, we should be well set up for the arrival. So many clothes! We've been doing laundry (well, Jerry has) and folding day and night, but the piles of clothes are not getting any smaller.

4.5 weeks to go!

I've had three showers in the past three weeks, and I'm exhausted! We're very grateful, though--we received a lot of useful baby things! Thanks, especially, to Mom and Dad for our stroller. I'm sure the baby will love it!

Here's a pic from the ladybug-themed shower (34 weeks):

In the last few weeks, I have heard plenty about my size--that I'm small! I certainly don't feel that way. I'm sure I'll balloon up a good deal this last month, though.

I think I'm ready to get this show on the road. I twisted my ankle a few weeks ago, and it just hasn't healed properly because of the extra weight. I'm trying to stay off my feet as much as possible, but I do have to get up to go to the bathroom occasionally! Just getting ready for work in the morning is exhausting. It's actually kind of frustrating--I have so much to do and so little energy to do it! I don't even know how much good I'll be during the holidays--they're just coming at a really bad time.

The water retention that everyone talks about has finally arrived! I am resisting the removal of my wedding band as long as I can--which might not be that much longer. I can't even move it around on my finger anymore. I don't want to remove it at all--it's such a part of me. But I don't want it to be cut off either!

Weird pregnancy symptom #325

I've been really fortunate to escape a lot of the major complaints of pregnancy so far: no morning sickness, no bloating, no bleeding or gestational diabetes. However, although the books do mention this symptom, it definitely seems like one of the stranger "benefits" of carrying a baby: nosebleeds. Since there's extra hormones and blood floating around, this makes them more likely. But let's just say it's really difficult to drive with a tissue stuck up your nose and your head tilted back. And postnasal drip is EXTRA enjoyable.

Add this to my growing list that includes exhaustion, foggy brain, sweating and strange nail growth. I only have 9 more weeks left--I'm a little curious to see what else Mother Nature brings me in what seems like a short period of time.